I want to take you back…
It was sometime near the end of 2009 — life felt heavy and overwhelming.
The divorce from my abusive husband was final, but I felt shattered.
As much as there was a level of peace, no longer sharing a home with someone who chose drugs over healing and rage over healthy communication, I was alone, raising four children who were just as broken as I.
It wasn’t just me who walked through a painful divorce, one I never wanted — my kids experienced the unthinkable when he decided to leave them for a woman he met in a bar instead of getting the help the judge ordered that would help him healthily learn to father. He left the state before our divorce was final, keeping his real why a secret, promising the kids that his move would make their life better because the claim was that he found a good job; he never returned to see them.
For me, I felt like the heaviest weight was placed over me — I couldn’t breathe and cried myself to sleep most nights.
Finances were scary — I hadn’t worked outside of my home in ten years, and child support was not honored by their father.
I was emotionally breaking down.
I felt abandoned by almost everyone in that season.
And my kids, well, I was barely holding on for me, trying my best to be there for them.
I crawled my way into my counseling session one day. I began to weep and share the details of my overwhelming week…my life.
My counselor sat there empathetically.
Concern and love were written across her face.
I took a breath.
She looked directly into my eyes and said,
“How can you glorify God through this?”
Those words that I knew were straight from the Holy Spirit hit me and sunk deep into my soul.
That question was sobering yet strengthening — my whole perspective began to shift.
My heart repeated the question in a whisper, “Lord, how can I glorify You through this?”
I spent the next few days and weeks with that question on repeat, becoming the most powerful, private, prayer between me and my Savior — the One I was living for.
I stopped walking through my days feeling sorry for myself and put my eyes on Him, the author and perfecter of my faith.
I made a decision eleven years prior that I wasn’t living for me anymore — I was all in, living for Him.
I’m an empowered vessel of the Holy Spirit, adopted and grafted into the family of God.
Made with purpose, for His purposes, and though I walk through the valleys, He is right by my side.
This shift propelled me into greater purpose.
God began to put people on my path that needed to know of His love for Him.
I stopped feeling overwhelmed by my circumstances and realized that I was positioned for such a time as this.
My outward circumstances weren’t changing, but I was. I learned how to yield to the Holy Spirit in the hard and lean to Jesus for peace and strength, and His joy was released from my life.
Those who became closest to me in that season couldn’t figure me out.
They learned of my story and couldn’t understand why this single mom of four kids who came out of an abusive situation, one who is NOT making financially, is so…
Confident, joyful, and filled with life?!
Why?
Because I took off my old garments and put on my new robe of righteousness…I wasn’t wearing my circumstances anymore — I was wearing Jesus!
I died to that old life.
I stopped living for me.
My God is alive, and He desires to live through me.
Friend,
This is the kingdom mindset that God wants us all to adopt. It keeps our focus on the bigger picture. It’s a powerful reminder of why we are here. As children of God, we are here to radiate Him. We are temples of the living God, the tangible hands and feet of Jesus. We have been designed and marked with purpose, made in His image to radiate and glorify Him.
Lying down, throwing in the towel, or giving up on life when it gets hard makes us victims of our circumstances instead of rising as victorious children of God!
We are more than conquerors through Him!
Does life hurt?
Yes.
Sometimes it just plain SUCKS!
But the benefit we have as children of God is that we can bring it all to Him. He will meet us, heal us, strengthen us, envelop us with His peace and comfort, simultaneously filling us with a supernatural joy that we get to release to those around us!
This is the testimony we get to share as we display the tangible evidence that our God is who He says He is and no matter what we walk through, He is glorified!
Are you walking through a painfully hard season?
I’m going to pass this torch and ask you the same…
How can you glorify God through your hard?
Pray with me:
Father, I’m coming to you today with a heart of repentance. I’m realizing I built my whole relationship on what you can do for me, keeping my attention on what’s wrong, and I’ve been sinking into a pit of hopelessness and defeat. Your Word says that those who cling to their life will lose it, but those who give up their life for you will find it. Today, I’m giving up my will, my way, my ideas, and my complaints, and putting my full attention on you. I believe that You have a purpose for my life and that purpose began the day I said yes to You — my Savior. I was made from glory, for Your glory, and I want to glorify you in all I do. Lord, I’m humbling myself before you today and asking you to show me life through your eyes — I want to see the way you see. Holy Spirit, fill me with your supernatural strength, make your home in me so that when others see me, they see my Father. May You be glorified in me and through me. In Jesus’ mighty name, amen.
“Arise, shine, for your light has come, and the glory of the LORD rises upon you.”
-Isaiah 60:1 (NLT)
I pray today’s devotional met you.
Much love, J
